Going through an old journal, I came across something I wrote in 2011:
Father, when you see my face, do you see Your face too?
I’m such a dim reflection of the Light I’ve found in You.
Father when you search my thoughts, does the love You give shine through?
Have I emptied me of self enough, to reveal my love for You?
Father, when you see my deeds, would they be your deeds too?
Do you know the yearning of my heart to do what you would do?
Father, when you see my will, how much of You is there?
Lord, take my will & make it Yours, leave nothing of me there.
Father when you see my light, is Your light shining through?
When other people look at me, may they instead see You.
Matthew 5:14-16 says, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.
It is my sincerest desire to reflect Christ’s light in this dark world. I desire make a difference for good. There is enough sadness. But it’s hard sometimes. I can’t lie. Sometimes I give dark thoughts a little too much room in my head. I am indulgent. I nurse present wounds and go back and rehearse old wounds. It’s almost as if pain is a familiar friend I keep around even though she brings me nothing but sadness. But I can always choose to walk in the Light. I can choose to put one foot in front of the other until my single steps begin to form a pathway back to joy. And only when I walk in Light, can I illuminate the path for others…the path to Christ…the path to peace.
God. Let me be Light and let me bring Light. Let me be a conduit of healing and love. Let me spread joy. Let me lead others to the peace I have found in You. Fill me Jesus, with You. Then I will look in the mirror and see less of me and more of You.